Christmas -- After the fact. . .

My children and I had a quiet Christmas at home. Instead of the traditional turkey dinner, I did the Black Southern thing and cooked gumbo. We ate until we hurt ourselves. That was one of our Christmas highlights.

My 17 year old daughter is not usually an emotional girl but after she opened her gifts on Christmas morning she sat on the floor looking as if she would cry at any moment. Sure enough, as soon as I asked her what was wrong – she burst into tears. My initial thought was that she was disappointed that she didn’t receive a gift she wanted. But she immediately corrected me and said that she was sad that this would likely be her last Christmas living at home because she’s off to college this fall. So, she and I sat and cried together for a few minutes. My how the time just whizzed by. I know it sounds cliché but it does seem that just yesterday she was a little bitty girl who always wanted to sit on my lap.

It’s funny because even though she’s now a 17-year old young woman, she still seems to want to jump right inside my skin. I’m always kidding her about invading my personal space but I will definitely miss her being “in my box” after she leaves. She’s not only been my “road dog” all these years, she’s been my best friend. She’s an incredibly mature young woman and I do wonder what it will be like when she leaves. Oh well, we shall soon find out.

My 22 year old son had some sadness on Christmas also. He was sad because his 3 ½ month old daughter spent Christmas in California with her mom. He sure hated missing her first Christmas.

This young man is one of the most compassionate people I’ve ever known. His compassion is truly one of his most admirable qualities. Yesterday we had a long conversation about various topics. And repeatedly during our conversation he would say things like, “if I had the money, I’d just give it to him” or “how can we help this person?” This child of mine has always been like the person who attracts stray dogs. Not to say that any of his friends are stray dogs but since junior high school he seemed to develop deep friendships with the neediest kids. And he would bring them home assuming that we would be able to do something to help. As a result, he had different friends practically living with us throughout all of his high school years.

Christmas highlighted his compassion all the more. A friend of his came to live with us for what I thought would be a couple weeks in September. Well, a few weeks turned into 3 months. I was so outdone by the extended stay and the extra mouth to feed that I was just flat out annoyed at the sight of his friend. My son did everything in his power to calm me during the 3 months because this friend had already had such a tough life financially that he just wanted him to experience a few months of peace.

I am so incredibly proud of both of my children. As I was sitting crying with my daughter on Christmas, I shed several tears about my son as well. This will also probably be his last Christmas at home. He’s a little slower moving than his sister in terms of being independent but I sense that he will soon be gone.
I do welcome this impending new chapter in my life, but I’m also a little sad that these kiddies of mine grew up so darn fast. I have been completely consumed with raising children for the past 22 years. What will I do with myself now?